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Showing posts from March, 2011


Babies are sleep stealin' things. Your bed and body are not your own when there's a baby about. It drags on for years, the fatigue, and you almost become accustomed to it. A resilient young body can sustain through a lack of sleep, especially for the love of a baby. They make you old and keep you young. I get to missing babies until my self preservation kicks in.

If your kid is healthy enough, you get a Sleeping Respite for a time.
Don't get too cozy.

Sleep eludes a mother of a teenaged boy. They're just not right. Frontal lobes and all. A person could worry themselves to death over a drifty 17 year old.

I don't know how atheists do it. My prayers are faithless enough.


And more ways...

• I seriously considered letting my teeth rot out of my head rather than endure another second at the dentist.

• I put off getting serious about my exercise program (or lack of, as it were). Again.

• I failed to make lesson plans in a timely fashion although I know I will regret this tomorrow.

• We ate out too many times this week. (Reversely, this inspired me to plan 7 meals, grocery shop on Sunday in anticipation of the week, precook 3 meals, wash and prep veggies and reorganize the Scratch and Dent ).

• I left a sink full of dirty dishes overnight after above cooking spree.

• I definitively declared that, on the next shopping trip for 13yo ManChild, I absolutely would not buy any jeans that said "skinny" or especially "low rise" and then caved within a half hour of being in the department store.

And my final act of being Not That Good Of A Person...


I am crazy about Freddy. I don't know why because he is useless and kinda dumb. He does not provide protection and he consistently pees under my armoire. He runs out of the house and has been known to steal chicken from people's grills and chocolate cake from people's carports. Once, when chasing him down, we discovered he had been going in a neighbor's house and making himself at home on the couch. He's not right, that Fred. He doesn't cuddle with me all the times that I want him to and he will stand on your chest while you lay down, which is painful. Around here, we have come to think of him as a Handsome Devil. He's pretty good for lookin' at, although I am pretty sure he suffers from anxiety. I attribute that to inbreeding. He's the first dog I ever bought. That's a terrible way to spend one's money. Especially if you are getting a deal like we got with 'ole Fred. I kiss him on the snout even though I think dogs are kinda gross and t…

Go Away, Winter.

Winter came back for one last stand. It's hateful. The longer it continues, the more I fantasize about moving to a tropical climate. Some quaint, little small town and it wouldn't hurt if it was about a half hour from Disney World. Or the beach. That would be for my husband and kids though because I kinda hate the beach.

Fair skin and Beach don't go well together. There's a good bit of prep work that goes into a trip to the beach for a Northern European descendent. A jillion SPF Sunscreen, a ridiculous hat, maybe an umbrella. Sitting in the sunshine is a remedy for the soul though. It's just that, at the beach, you're kinda stuck for the whole morning or afternoon because the kids ain't wanting to leave. Good moms bring lunch so then you're there for the duration. However, there are many things I gladly endure for a day at Disney.

I consistently fantasize about finagling a trip to Walt Disney World. When I get the green light, I obsessively plan our t…

Don't argue with your mother.

Me: "Now, listen, baby. I don't want you to be up in this doctor's office interrupting me, correcting me or talking over me when I am trying to communicate with this ENT.

13 year old man-child: (Pause) "Okay."

35 minutes later...

ENT Nurse Practioner to man-child: "What grade are you in?"

Man-Child: "Mom, what grade am I in?"

Can't win for losing. Please don't tell anyone we are homeschoolers.

Here are some ways I'm Not That Good Of A Person as of today:

• I ate too many potato chips even while I drank Pepsi Zero.
• I indulged in thinking about how boring this gal talkin' at me was. (The implication being, of course, that I, myself, would never or could never bore someone.)
• I didn't drink any water all day until bedtime, which is never a good idea.
• I resented my husband. Out loud.
• Then there was an internal eye roll at how uptight that other person was.

On the flip side, I might be pulling out of my winter doldrums. I made it to church.


My lovin' man took me to a favorite locavore restaurant downtown. We ate some fresh fish. Swimming In The Ocean Yesterday Tuna. It was delicious.

We parked downtown in his favorite parking place which happens to be in front of an historical church and next to an historical park. Someone had stolen the historical marker which told the story of how the church got historical. Of course, it just happens to also be located on an historical street where visitors and locals alike historically come to cavort the night away with giant beers and neon beverages. We noticed as we were heading to aforementioned delicious fish that a fellow was relieving himself in the aforementioned historical park in a public trash receptacle. We made some jokes because what else is there to do upon seeing a fellow relieve himself into a public trash can? It ain't right.

I keep pondering the dilemma of one who has made a home in an historical park in an urban area. Where else would he relieve himself? …

How can anyone not like Peter Pan? J.M. Barrie is a sensitive soul.

A couple of years ago my book club read the original Peter Pan. I love this book and highly recommend, especially for mothers. The gals weren't into it like me, though, not having the emotional history with All Things Disney and Especially Peter Pan that I do.

Captain Hook was a complex character in the book which was a pleasant surprise. And Peter...he is fantastically, amazingly flawed. I can relate.

Definitely check it out. And, just for the record, I DO NOT buy into the theory that Barrie was homosexual.

Currently reading:

Katherine by Anya Seton (my choice)

Radical by David Platt (bookclub)

A Piece of the Mountain: The Story of Blaise Pascal by Joyce McPherson (kid's Humanities lessons)

The Unwritten Rules of Social Relationships: Decoding Social Mysteries Through the Unique Perspectives of Autism by Temple Grandin (my choice, in anticipation of meeting Temple Grandin next month)

It's good to laugh.

My husband went for a jog today. Preceding, he pantomimed his jog in the bedroom, intermittently waving at pretend neighbors, while wearing some gray undies and an Elmer Fudd hat.

It tickled me.

A good thing, too, because I think I might have carpal tunnel due to playing too much Angry Birds. I said I wasn't that good of a person. There's further proof.