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Tidings of comfort and joy.

My blogs get weird in the winter because I am unhappy in winter. No other season illustrates why I'm not that good of a person quite so well as gloomy, doomy winter. Sometimes I catch myself on the way down but often those around me have to shine some light before I can see just how deep this well runs.

I haven't seen the bottom in a while which makes for a particularly tricky season. I get curious but, blessedly, it continues to elude me. There are other distractions, responsibilities and joys on a downward spiral but a filter of Grace is required to see in the darkness. Being not that good of a person, the Father mercifully distracts me with those Responsibilities and, in them, His Glory is revealed and I can see the foothold which helps me reach higher still to Joy.

Joy reveals itself when my Beautiful Daughter sings Christmas carols in her opera voice for my entertainment because the innocence in her eyes still protects her. Or when my HMB says he needs to hang up now because he hasn't hung with his siblings all evening. Or when he brags that he's the glue who holds them together and it's true. Or when a Man Child stops me in the breezeway to give me an encouraging hug. Or maybe he needed it instead. Or when those Big Boys put their arms around me and recognize I need their voices lifted in prayer for me this time. Or when Lovin' Man refuses to let me withdraw into myself because he really does want me to stay with him.

No matter who's missing or what's happening, I'm doing my best and that ain't too bad for Not That Good.


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