NTGOAP...Til there was You.

Your feathers appear delicately beautiful and mysterious but their might is awesomely powerful and strong. From a distance, I can’t even imagine the shelter they provide. I let the space between us overwhelm me. I choose instead to take cover in my own regret. 

Grief wants to bind me and shame is my cloak. In the shadow of my own faithless sin, I cannot even lift my eyes. Discouragement whispers and I believe his lies.

Each morning, I have a new mercy but, as it’s falling from the sky, I let it drift just out of my reach. Heaviness lies to me. “You’ll never find it. It’s too late.” Even in sleep, I am exhausted, bound and seemingly broken. That is, until I hear Your sweet song calling my name.

Lift up your head, child of God. Lift up your head. 

You call. 
It’s then I remember I love you. I remember I’m Yours. I remember that’s all that I have to remember. 

I stand. 
It’s then that I have the strength to throw off all that so easily entangles me. This is not for me. 

I reach up. It’s then that I realize, you are the shadow under which I find my rest and refuge. You are the fortress in whom I trust. As you scoop me up under your wing, You smile softly and say, I was right here all along, silly girl. 

When you pierce through the sin and the fear and the despair and the “but, this” refrains, the night is as bright as the day and it’s under the shadow of Your Almighty Grace, I find the joy that I convinced myself was lost altogether.

Silly and foolish and faithless as I am, I am Yours and that’s enough.